fruitcake

I tested the physical attributes of this fruitcake! I got some great data but I'm not really clear on why someone would want to eat this.

Dear Santa, I know that kids are usually the ones writing you letters but this year I’m wondering if you might consider the request of a humble but hard working texture analyzer. I mean this year I was *really really good.

I helped a wide variety of teams on the coolest stuff you can imagine. Gosh, you should see all the papers, patents, posters, and symposiums I was referenced in! In case you are curious, here’s just a few of the exciting projects I assisted with: 

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Okay, so I know that getting a letter from lab equipment isn’t exactly standard protocol but I really think you should consider my requests. Just think of all that I contribute to the holidays! I’ve helped improve the nutrition of gingerbread, test breakability of candy canes, and quantify the physical attributes of fruitcake to name just a few examples.

Okay, so on to my list:

I’d really really love a video capture system. Okay, partially for selfies (I’m on Facebook!) but mainly for capturing fast movements that aren’t easily observed by the human eye.

A dough inflation system. I promise it’s for more than just party tricks.

A dynamic integrated balance. A secondary load cell and synchronized scale in one? I want!

If there’s room in the sleigh, I’d love a Volscan Profiler. Or a Peltier Temperature Cabinet. It would be great to have another instrument to talk shop with. I mean, it gets kind of lonely here in the lab with just the centrifuge.

As many new probes and fixtures as possible! I mean, I just can’t decide. There are so many I want. Maybe an extrusion fixture. No, wait how about a three-point bend rig? Or a new cone probe..I could go on and on.

Thanks so much Santa! While the lights will be out in the lab I hope that you’ll find the cookies that I left for you. I tested them three ways!

Happy holidays,

The TA.XTPlus

p.s. They were too shy to write but TA.HDPlus wouldn’t mind a new rig and the TA.XT2 would love an upgrade.

  • Just like Santa, this letter is fictional. Your texture analyzer probably did not write it. However, there’s still time to get your end of the year requests in! Contact our team of elves (aka regional managers) for assistance!

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